Darkness calls, I don't answer.

Light moves across, dries away the cold.

Close my eyes, dampness drains.

Open my eyes, shadows fall away to brightness.

Publically, I exhalted myself. Privately, I destroyed myself.
Always wanting to win the unbeatable.

Outside, I'm here. Inside, I AM.
No less no more, with me again.

When it's bad, beg and beg. If

it's good then anything? No, nothing.

Who do you belong? Trust yourself, to what

ends? How long before you don't get up again.

I've given all, what's left?

There's more. What's most difficult to let go.

Something, that led me.

Vehicle of destruction, untie the cords.

First mistake was right. Second mistake was wrong.

I want to live, Living God.

Brick by brick, building slowly, carefully.

Stumble, fall, get back up again.

Seems I'll never make it,

but I know. What force wants to destroy

me? What force will keeps me alive instead. I'm tired, let

me rest. I can still feel who I AM. The spark flames up again.

My faith is tested. You'll do

anything to keep

me in

the darkness.

I won't go, not anymore. It's not my

place, and you don't belong. Cross,

to welcome.

Early on I must have learned that pain always

precedes pleasure, so I came to not only endure

the suffering, but expect it too. I'd always take

the misery to be able to satisfy the temptation, short

lived as it ever was.

Being Made

Victim or violator, which one do you want to be?

Victim becomes violator, sooner or later.

The violator loses control again, and falls away to her own despair.

Victim or violator, which do you prefer?

Step out of the loop, admit the truth about yourself.